"G-5 needs to recall this product immediately. Although the subliminal messages are sufficiently well buried that neither our young subjects nor their caretakers will ever notice, certain glitches that have crept into this early model have induced extremely unpleasant side effects in many of our subjects. Since March of last year, sixty-seven (67) caretakers have reported that their young charges experience tremors and scream hysterically for hours on end after only a few minutes' exposure to the Raffi Unconscious Obedience Program VII (currently marketed to the public under the title "Singable Songs"). We feel that such severe side effects may prove detrimental to our project by alerting the general public to its existence. Therefore it is imperative that you recall these defective units immediately and replace them with the newer model. Thank you. --. "

I see music as a river, and the water in a river is there for everyone and anyone that wants to have a sip can have a sip and have some water. Now somewhere along the line someone came up with the idea of putting the river water in bottles and selling the bottles of water. That's the record industry. Music is a river, music is water, and the bottling company is the industry, and it's not inherently evil, because it's frankly, convenient to have water in a bottle, so if you're driving in your car and you're thirsty you don't have to drive to the nearest river and take a sip, you can just reach down and take a sip out of your bottle. The same way if I'm driving in my car and I want to hear a song, I don't have to drive over to the people's house and ask them to play it for me, I can put the CD in and listen to it, or turn on the radio."

Where it gets ugly is that when the bottling company, since their aim is to make money-- at some point they may have thought like, "Let's bottle this water and that way we can share the healthful qualities of water with all the people." At some point it becomes, "This is our industry, we need to make money, and how can we increase profits?" Well, the way to increase profits is to try to discourage people from going to the river, and having to buy the bottled water. And they'll start with that but eventually what they're going to get into is they're going to start blocking the river or they're going to poison the river. But water is always moving, and it's very difficult to poison a river, very hard indeed.

"The outcome was as unusual as the band itself: this week the United States Postal Service - the real one, as in stamps and letters - signed an agreement with Sub Pop granting a free license to use the name in exchange for working to promote using the mail. Future copies of the album and the group's follow-up work will have a notice about the trademark, while the federal Postal Service will sell the band's CD's on its Web site, potentially earning a profit. The band may do some television commercials for the post office."

"The group also agreed to perform at the postmaster general's annual National Executive Conference in Washington on Nov. 17. The attendees might not realize what a rare treat they are in for since the Postal Service does not play many gigs."

"Seems like we've been meeting people, and playing for people through all these very important states, and it seems like we got the message across that everyone here is going to vote. So now my only concern, and our only concern is that, cause there's a lot of talk about November 3rd you know. Things can start anew on November 3rd, it could be a new world on November 3rd, the work begins on November 3rd. But I'm just worried that people are thinking that they gotta vote on November 3rd. So can I use you for the cameras at home, they can look at you if you put up your hands and tell them what day it's on." (Everyone holds up peace sign)

If You Swear, You'll Catch No Fish
Better Than A Stick in the Eye
Something Green and Leafy This Way Comes
Better Than Eddie Vedder
Don't Have The Cow
Reality is a Ride on the Bus
G.I. Joe Gets Angry With Human Kind
The Quest For Fun
Michelle Pfeiffer's Diaper
You Make Me Thick
He's not getting older, he's getting Bitter

They are trying to run it as if they're selling widgets, plastic-wrapped widgets that they can sell more of. And they want easily definable, easily accessible, easily creatable, controllable product that has a built-in die-out, so that they can create some more.

By that, I mean, "Get me a lead singer. He's got sort of an androgynous blonde hair, very pretty. We need a guitar player, sort of hatchet-faced, wears a hat, plays very fast, very dramatic. He must be very dramatic. Get me a pound of bass player, pound of drummer. I don't think he needs keyboards; I think we look good. And we'll call them the Bosco Bombers! No. The Bad Dogs, that's good! I like that!" And then you sell it. You sell the hell out of it. You spend $500,000 on record promoting, and they make a lot more. But they're making little cardboard cutouts.

It doesn't matter that Britney Spears has nothing to say and is about as deep as a birdbath. It matters that she has cute tits, and that's all that matters. She doesn't sing in concert; none of them do. Those are samples. Push a button, out comes the vocal. Do you ever notice, when you're listening to them in a live concert -- any of them, Janet Jackson, any of the rest of them -- that they're not breathing heavy? Even though they're dancing like crazy. That's because you're not hearing what they're singing. You're hearing a tape.