In a nutshell, I'd suffocate.

Muji Bento Box

Posted on January 25, 2008
Bento Box
I picked up this bento box from Muji last winter while in Japan. It looks small but I never seem to go hungry when bringing this and a piece of fruit on the side, and on the days when I need a bit extra I pack my stacked thermal kit (not the same one but close) that holds rice, miso soup, meat and veg in their own separate container. It packs more than enough food then again weighs as much as a large infant so I'm reluctant to lug it to work everyday.
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The World of Golden Eggs

Posted on December 18, 2007
While walking through HMV the other day I stopped to watch this hilarious clip from MTV Japan's The World of Golden Eggs. Unfortunately I don't think the entire series is subtitled.
Update: all of season 1 and 2 can be found online here.
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Yamanote Song

Posted on May 08, 2007

A little song I ripped from a tape of NHK children's programing to help you remember the stations on the JR yamanote line.
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Japan OverSea Internet Television (JOSITV)

Posted on November 18, 2005
Masako can now get her fix of Japanese TV thanks to Japan OverSea Internet Television (JOSITV) -- an updated list of video files from all the major Japanese networks, including news and variety shows (which covers just about everything).

They seem to be in a very early stage, and if popularity picks up will probably turn to a subscription model. Give us the option of choosing the shows we want to watch that week and have high quality video waiting on my hard drive every day ready for viewing, and you'll have my credit card number.
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Canned Coffee

Posted on October 10, 2005
I have fond memories of my first canned coffee shortly after arriving in Japan. My mother-in-law stocked the fridge with a few cans of Georgia Emerald Mountain Blend, and not long after she noticed I took a liking to it a case appeared above the laundry machine. Brewing a pot of coffee should not be on any sane persons to-do list during a hot Japanese summer afternoon, so those cold cans of Georgia, along with Mild Sevens, became close, close friends that summer. I had an on-again off-again relationship with the stuff. On when a newly designed can or brand showed up in stores and vending machines, and off when my body started sending me those little tell-tale signs that if I kept consuming the coffee-flavoured beverage bad stuff would follow.

By far the best, and only place to my knowledge for can coffee reviews can be found in Kuhaku and in the Chin Music Press blog Coffee Mondays. Now Chin Music Press brings us Canned Coffee.
"Coffee and literature have always made quite a team. There's nothing like opening a good book in your favorite cafe, a steaming cup of coffee by your side. But canned coffee and literature is downright lethal. It's headache-inducing and desperate. Cannedcoffee.com is the urban response to cowboy poetry, a prose inspired by Japan's multicolored vending machines full of hot and cold coffee cans."
They've got posters, an e-book, and most importantly an all-in-one RSS feed.
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The Imagery of Kawahara Kazuhiko

Posted on September 19, 2005
Kawahara Kazuhiko
I can't believe it's taken this long to come across the incredibly sick imagery of Kawahara Kazuhiko, AKA Palla. He takes photographs from the urban landscape of Osaka and mixes them to create beautiful mirrored and other interesting effects. His published book, The Book of Pallalink, is for sale in limited quantity and more work can be found on his weblog. Thanks to Jean Snow.
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Tokyo and Stephen Wiltshire

Posted on June 25, 2005
stephen.jpg

I just caught a short documentary on Stephen Wiltshire, one of a very short list of prodigious savants who possesses the extraordinary ability of being able to study urban landscapes and sketch them from memory in great, almost Where's Waldo detail. For the show, Stephen was invited to Tokyo and spent 30 minutes taking in 360 degrees of Tokyo skyline from the roof top (270 meters up) of Roppongi Hills. He was then provided a 360 degree 10 meter wide canvas, a box of pencils and pens, and in seven days had completed what was a remarkably accurate panorama of the Tokyo skyline. His longest ever panoramic drawing, and guaranteed to have given him a pretty bad case of writers cramp many times over. Absolutely Incredible. Understand this is coming from someone who couldn't win a game of memory against his daughter even if I cheated (and often), but most should really be able to appreciate Stephen's gift on both mental and artistic levels.

Check out Stephen's website for more info on himself and his art. His site is also hosting clips of the show narrated in English, as well as a few photographs. Here's a video (1 MB) of the completed panorama.
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Pulled Mandom Ad

Posted on June 11, 2005
A mailing list I watch, which is concerned primarily with human rights issues in Japan, recently started a letter writing campaign to have Mandom pull an ad for Gatsby facial towels. The ad features a group of black men dressed in typical Rastafarian garb cleaning their faces with the wipes, and as the camera pans across the room a chimpanzee dressed in the same clothing is shown mimicking the others. Personally, I wasn't outraged by the ad. Done in poor taste yes, and I can fully understand how others would be seriously offended by the depiction of black men as primates. So I was happy to hear today that the protest was a success and Mandom pulled the ad and issued an apology. Congratulations to all those involved.

The ad was also removed from Mandom's website, but I was able to capture the stream a few days ago so you can have some idea what we're talking about.

Mandom's Gatsby 'Mogeha' ad (1.9 MB)
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When Coffeehouses Attack

Posted on April 07, 2005
After reading about the Starbucks Delocator on BoingBoing last night I was going to write something about all the Anti-Starbucks rhetoric but this morning see Kurt Easterwood already did a splendid job of laying out what I wanted to say. He quotes the delocator.net Why Delocate? page and goes on to say:
"All employees receive the exact same training.... It's about fucking time! It actually sounds a lot like Japan, and while the manual-abiding "cog-like workforce" of Japan can be rightfully derided as a bit sterile, cold, and lacking in creativity, when it comes to retail, I'll take it any day of the week over the laissez faire attitude that seems to pervade much of American retail. And let's face it, American retail has by and large the worst customer service of any developed country on the planet. It sucks."
Kurt also links to Adam Greenfield's Anti-Anti Starbucks/Ikea rant Ikeaphobia and its discontents, an article I've pointed quite a few people to in the past. I certainly don't see anything wrong in searching for alternatives, or even independent alternatives but criticizing a successful business like starbucks for "making all of the stores identical: the same beverages, food, ambient sounds and smells" seems to miss the point why people frequent them, consistency. And in Japan that also means a smoke free environment, which is worth the price alone. A completely smoke free environment is a rarity in Japan and while other businesses changed their policies to allow smoking (Subway I'm looking at you) Starbucks didn't budge keeping every store smoke free.

Personally I'd like to see more energy focused on the origins of the raw product itself. We don't all have the privilege of living in uber-progressive centers where Fair Trade, organic or shade grown coffee is readily available, so for the rest of us who don't want to buy Folgers and care where our coffee comes from a Starbucks is a welcome sight.
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Up is the New Down

Posted on April 04, 2005
Japan's got to be the only country in the world where the little old ladies dye their hair purple, and the punker teens are dying theirs grey. Fire Engine Red, Smurf Blue, Radioactive Green and Geriatric Grey? The Sunday afternoon bingo crowd looks like they're heading to a D.O.A. concert and shawls with gold beaded eyeglass chains are hip among schoolgirls.

Completely unrelated, but if I see another sideways trucker-cap I think I'm going to vomit, right after I kick the offending party in the back of the knee. My dad used to bring us those from the paper mill he worked at. They were lame back then and still are today.
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Tsurunen Marutei

Posted on March 28, 2005
While transferring between lines in Noborito this morning I came across a campaigning politician donning a large red sash and handing out pamphlets to commuters on the footpath between stations. This is in no way an uncommon occurrence here, but what surprised me was that my outreached hand actually scored a pamphlet, as this almost never happens. Most campaigning politicians that I've come across will hold back their flyers when I walk past. Who could blame them? How could someone with white skin possibly vote or even read Japanese for that matter. Of course this isn't always the case, just my own experience.

Another surprise was that the politician who handed me the flyer was Tsurunen Marutei, the first foreign-born member of the Diet (Japanese parliament). Born Martti Turunen in Finland he obtained Japanese citizenship in 1979. Tsurunen entered politics in 1992 when he was elected to the town assembly of Yugawara, Kanagawa and in 2002 when Ohashi Kyosen resigned Tsurunen took his seat in the Diet.
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Yokohama Now and Then

Posted on February 15, 2005
I've been following Vincent's Now and Then photographs of Yokohama since he started posting them in September. His shots of modern day Sakuragicho, Yamashita-koen, Motomachi and nineteen other city landmarks contrasted against postcards of Yokohama during the Meiji Era (1868�1912) are quite interesting.
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Raifu Izu Randamu

Posted on February 05, 2005
I haven't seen any on the streets yet but certain sects of the Japanese public sure have cottoned to the iPod Shuffle. Reload the page to shuffle the top four images. [via tuaw]
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For best results, handle thalidomide only with great care

Posted on February 04, 2005
I hate to pooh-pooh on the Japanese health care system, as I was quite impressed by the whole child birth experience, but why does this not surprise me?
"According to a 2003 survey by the Health, Labor and Welfare Ministry, only half of the doctors who said they were administering thalidomide made sure they collected unused tablets from patients. There were even doctors who did not confirm whether female patients were pregnant when prescribing the drug."
Doctor Riviera, Doctor Nick Riviera. Please report to the coroner immediately.
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Millionaire Airing

Posted on February 02, 2005
If you're in front of the tube tomorrow evening check out Millionaire on channel 8 (Fuji TV) at 7pm. They will air the episode which Masako's friend Hiroko competes on. They will also air video of Masako, Frankie and the rest of her brains as there was a camera on them in Hiroko's home during the entire show. And please folks, do not adjust your television set. Frankie really is that cute.

Update: 2,500,000 yen ($24,000) ain't too shabby eh? I've got the video in Quicktime but don't have the diskspace to host it just yet. The video is here.
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Kuhaku & Other Accounts from Japan

Posted on January 30, 2005
Jeremy's post today reminded me that this book's been untouched on my shelf for too long. When I first learned about Kuhaku I knew if I didn't order it then it would've been forgotten shortly after. I bought the book and it seems to have been ignored on the shelf anyhow. Having only skimmed it I would still recommend this book for anyone who appreciates quality crafted and beautifully designed books, and of course an interest in Japan helps. Serious thought went into creating this book which is evident from the Chin Music Press website.
Our goal is to resurrect some of the best practices of publishing in past centuries in books that tell decidedly modern stories. We want, on the one hand, to recreate that sense of awe book lovers get when they enter the rare books room at Powell's City of Books in Portland, Oregon, and, on the other, to feed that appetite among readers for fresh, unflinching and entertaining looks at our world. In short, we want it all.
Details like the book's cover and even chapter headers are documented in great detail and one could learn a lot about the publishing process from their weblog. And can't forget the cool illustrations by Kozyndan created from panoramic photos by art director Craig Mod (who was also kind enough to mail me a copy of the book from Japan).
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Brain for Hire

Posted on January 24, 2005
I forgot to mention this earlier but Masako and two other sets of sweaty palms are currently awaiting a call from Fuji TV studios where they're taping an episode of Millionaire (the Japanese variant of the famous British game show "Who want�s to be a Millionaire?"). Her friend was picked to audition for the show, passed and picked Masako as one of her three lifelines, or brains as their called in Japan. I've never seen this show so I really don't know what to expect.

Masako's friend Hiroko was picked for the show because of her family�s current situation as well. Her husband, and a friend of mine, is from the Maldives and while his family survived the Tsunami they also lost everything. They're planning on going back to help rebuild their town in the next few months, so the added funds would really help. Keeping my fingers crossed.
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Beach in January

Posted on January 23, 2005
We spent a brisk Saturday afternoon at Enoshima watching hawks circle and dive bomb people eating lunch on the beach steps. We were very careful, making sure not expose any food to the sky and still one of the huge birds swooped down going for what I guess was Frankie's milk box. No crowds, no vendors, and no speakers blasting Coca-cola jingles repeated ad nauseam. The Shibuya crowd can have Enoshima for their few weeks in the summer, and we'll take it the rest of the year. Just wish they'd leave it a bit cleaner.
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Enoshima Aquarium

Posted on January 10, 2005
What better way to spend a beautiful sunny day than at an indoor aquarium. Well I guess we could have gone bowling...

Frankie was really able to appreciate the aquarium exhibits this time. She bounced on my knee and clapped through the entire dolphin show, though I could have done without the whole "look, it thinks it's people!" aspect of the show. It may not be the most authentic wildlife experience for her, but until she can take the Zodiac ride out whale watching in the Strait of Juan de Fuca, this will have to do.
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Look at all that Pink and Purple

Posted on November 11, 2004
I did a double take last night when I got my change back from the convenience store clerk, thinking he was trying to pass off some of that funny Canadian money. After a visit to the ATM today I see all the new 1,000, 5,000 and 10,000 yen note are in full circulation. Here's a Bank of Japan page that explains the new security features, which are plentiful. The 5,000 yen note, shown above, features a portrait of Ichiyo Higuchi, a 19th century novelist and the first woman to appear on a Japanese banknote.
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Phiten: Junk Science Abounds

Posted on October 29, 2004
Recently I've seen a surge in people wearing these Phiten bracelets (fabric-covered PVC rubber cord containing powdered titanium) and necklaces. This so-called therapeutic brand of accessories are really catching on in Japan. My neighbourhood has its own Phiten store with life size cut out of professional athlete endorser Randy Johnson, and they were apparently worn by the entire Japanese Olympic volleyball team. Even Phiten's TV commercials run during prime-time, and seem to market to the every-person and not just as an athletic accessory, hence all the men in suits I see wearing them on the train. Through the act of "Phild Processing" titanium the super jewelry is said to relieve pain and stiffness in muscles, and improve blood circulation by regulating the body's electrical current. Alrighty then.

I've never entered any Phiten shop or bothered to listen to a sales pitch so I found this account on skeptic James Randi's site of Phiten's test for potential buyers very interesting.
"They have a brown paper carrier bag that contains a brick shaped object wrapped up in newspaper and tape. They ask you to stand, extend your arm and lift the bag from a chair. You then put the bag down, and they drape the necklace across your arm and ask you to lift the bag again. It's supposed to be easier with the necklace on your body. Three of my Japanese work colleagues were so impressed by this that they bought the necklaces and eagerly repeated the demonstration around the office."

"I have an idea why this "test" might appear to work. When a person tries to pick up an object the brain makes a rough guess as to how much strength it's going to require. With an unknown object wrapped in paper, we have no idea how much it's going to weigh. The Phiten brick is actually quite heavy, and most people are likely to underestimate the effort required. The test with the necklace draped over the arm is always the second attempt, by which time our brain has recalculated and knows exactly how much effort is required. Hence it seems much easier to lift."
Phiten has a US website, but do people actually buy into this type of junk science overseas? If so, I've got some magic beans I need to get out of storage.
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How to Help the Earthquake Victims of Niigata

Posted on October 27, 2004

For those who would like to help with the earthquake relief effort in Niigata, Japan Post will send emergency relief packages for
free if you send them to the Nagaoka City Hall at:


940-8501
Niigata-Ken, Nagaoka-Shi
Sawai-machi, 2-Chome 1-1
Nagaoka Shiyakusho
Saigai Taisaku Honbu


How and What to send:
- Items other than cash (which must be sent in GENKIN KAKIDOME
special delivery) and which do not require special handling (cool
items or fragile items)
- Relief Items (clothing, blankets, non-perishable food, daily
amenities (diapers, alcohol spray, towels, saran wrap), school
items, newspapers, magazines, etc.) packable in a
small package (KOTSUTSU YUUBIN BUTSU) which doesn't require special
handling.


Pack only new items and one type of item in each box (ie.
a box of drinking water, or a box of food, or a box of daily
amenities) and refrain from sending the following:
- Used underwear or used blankets (even laundered)
- Fresh, perishable foods


Label contents on outside of package
Please mark KYUUENJO YOU (For Emergency Relief)


Other Conditions
- Sender may not request specific distribution of goods (as in
sending to a specific person, village or group.)
- Items may not be sent to gain profit.
- Packages to individuals are not eligible for this service.


Free shipping is only available until 24-Nov. You can also call the P.O.
and have them pick the package up at your doorstep. More information in Japanese here. Thanks to Kathy S. for rounding this up.

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Earthquake(s)

Posted on October 23, 2004
Holy crap that was scary! I'm counting eight quakes since 5:56 p.m. between 6.8 M and 5.1 M, six of which were strong enough to get us under the kitchen table. If this keeps up we'll need to buy a larger kitchen table, something that can comfortably fit all three of us during these multiple quake sessions. No damage here but media is reporting two deaths, multiple injuries, damaged homes, blackouts, broken water mains and a derailing a bullet train in Niigata prefecture.

As of this writing (9:02 p.m.) NHK and FNN are saying there may still be another big one tonight. That makes me feel much better. Other accounts in the area Blogd, Wirefarm and Cerebral Soup.
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Parachute Journalism

Posted on October 20, 2004
A fascinating piece of fiction written by a twelve year old on this utopian make believe country called Japan, published in the San Francisco Chronicle the other week --- or that it would be if it were meant to be fiction by an actual twelve year old. In this perfect land of Japan the police don't carry guns and the few criminals that they do deal with,
"often turn themselves in within a week; they simply feel too guilty, and honor dictates that they face the music of justice rather than hide."
Right, and the Bushido code of honour is alive and well in the Japanese criminal community. Adam Sparks, if that's even his real name, goes on to say that there's no homeless problem. I guess Adam failed to notice the blue tarp village in Ueno park, or the bodies lined up every morning sleeping on cardboard boxes in Shinjuku station. But the final insult comes when he reveals the true intent of his article, that the Japanese
"perceive [Bush] as a simple, honest and straight-talking, straight-shooting country cowboy."
Earth to Mr. Sparks, dispite that being far from the truth, when we in the international "Reality-Based Community" call someone simple and people like Bush cowboys it's not meant as a complement.

Feel free to read the entire gush and mush article in its hilarity. I do have one question for Mr. Sparks though. When you pulled all these stereotypes and assertions out of your ass, did it hurt? This is the type of fluff I would expect to read on someone's weblog (like mine) after a few days spent in a foreign land, but not from a major US daily.
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Kanji Tattoos

Posted on October 18, 2004
Living in Japan I see the English language mutilated on a daily basis. Nonsensical English on clothing, advertisements, stationary and catch phrases repeated ad nauseam. Then again, I have to give Japanese credit for not tattooing these on their bodies. We can't say the same for many in the west who, despite their best intentions, just can't seem to get it right the first time, which when you think about it is pretty imperative considering the temporary nature of a tattoo.

Personally I think Kanji tattoos are silly, but if you feel the need to show your individually in a foreign language please, please, make sure and double check your usage by those who actually speak the language. And when consulting with a native speaker be sure to watch for raised eyebrows and signs of held back laughter.

Update: Looks like the website I linked to above Hanzi Smatter, a website dedicated to the misuse of Chinese characters in Western culture, ran out of bandwidth. A little googling came up with Jeremy's take on Kanji tattoos, and a few words of caution on character stroke order.
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NHK: Little Clip Board Mafia

Posted on October 11, 2004
Just when we really start to appreciate NHK programming, a scandal breaks and another 13,000 irate viewers refuse to pay. I say 'another' because I and pretty much everyone I know have always refused to pay the extortion fee that everyone with a television is required to pay. NHK relies on 'subscriber' fees for it's programming, but unlike public broadcasting in North America, NHK doesn't hold telethons or ask for donations. NHK dispatches hired goons with combovers door to door who demand you hand over cash, even if you don't watch NHK. Every time we've moved the drill starts all over, with the new NHK pimp making a visit within a week looking for his cheddar. I usually end up politely telling him where to stick his clipboard, we part ways and I imagine him striking a big red X with skull and bones through our address. The only way you can easily get out of paying the fee is by not owning a television, and the clip board mafia always asks to come in and verify the fact you never joined the twentieth century.

Honestly though, I wish there was a way for us to make one time donations just as I would with public broadcasting in Canada if Fran was watching their children's programming. Call me stubborn, but I just don't respond well to threats or lectures about "you now in my country".
NHK: We Break Remote Controls.
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Belly Button Theft

Posted on October 04, 2004
A little known fact (was at least to me) is that during a thunder storm, Japanese children are taught to lean forward and cup their hands over their belly buttons to protect it from the thunder. Apparently, in Japanese folklore, the god of lightning and thunder (Kaminari-sama) is thought to steal belly buttons. I'm not aware of any preference for innies or outties, but I would assume the smell of fear plays a big part (e.g. dogs, bees).
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Ready to Kill

Posted on September 23, 2004
It's 12:30 AM and do you now where your delinquent, good for nothing, motorcycle gang member son is? Making his third pass past my apartment revving his tricked out bike louder than once thought possible with a 100 of his closest friends, waking my daughter and bringing her to tears. That's where.
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The New Japan Photography Mailing List

Posted on September 22, 2004
The Japan Photography Mailing List spontaneously combusted yesterday when out of the blue the list maintainer Juergen Specht decided on his own it was no longer worth his trouble and deleted both the list of 250 plus members and more than a years worth of archived messages from his servers with no warning. Those thousands of messages accumulating a wealth of information, reviews, advice and general photography conversation between its members. Thanks Juergen, that was real swell of you. Jerk. Read what Jim, Kristen and Kurt had to say.

The list has been tentatively restarted at Yahoo! Groups so if want to join, or for that matter re-join the conversation send a mail to japanphoto-subscribe[at]yahoogroups[dot]com
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Sunscreen Film Festival

Posted on September 21, 2004
From the crew that brought us Sundown Sessions comes the Sunscreen Film Festival. An independent short-film contest for both first-time and veteran filmmakers. The submission deadline is October 22nd and the 10 finalist films will be screened Sunday November 21st in Shimokitazawa.

For all the details download the official info pack (pdf 1MB).
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Shimokitazawa Exhibition: 10 Photographs

Posted on September 17, 2004

After the last few weeks of selecting, editing, printing and framing (no blood, a few tears and plenty sweat) ten photographs are now ready for my exhibition on Sunday. If you're in the area come by and enjoy the live and dj'd tunes from 5 till 10.

Date: Sunday Sept. 19th 5pm to 10pm
Event: Sundown Session 13.0
Venue: Antena Cafe, 2-14-2 Shimokitazawa JOW Building 4F
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Coco Ichiban Curry

Posted on August 08, 2004
I can't think of anything that would go better with curry then cheese, well maybe deep fried sausage. Coco Ichiban (pronounced: Coco Ichiban) is a chain Japanese curry shop and if at Burger King you can HAVE IT YOUR WAY® then at Coco you can HAVE IT PRETTY MUCH ANY GODAMN WAY YOU LIKE ® I say 'pretty much' because you probably couldn't ask for it to be served in your pocket or in your shoe, but then again I've never tried so I couldn't really say.

Coco Ichiban has got to have one of the most customizable menus on the planet, so much so that the back page of the eight panel menu lists five steps titled "How to Order". First you pick your meat, seafood, vegetable or miscellaneous. Choices range from menchi-katsu (battered deep fried hamburger), deep fried squid, cream filled crab croquette, eggplant or tofu which can only be classified as miscellaneous. Thirty-four choices in total, basically anything that can be thrown into the deep frier. Octopus, no problem. pickeled eggs, why not. Shoelace, sounds good. Next comes your choice of curry. If you don't specify then pork curry is the default "gravy" as they say in India, but you also have beef curry to choose from.

If you're one of those guys, and I say "guys" because I've never heard a woman say this, that loves really spicy food or rather likes taking about how they can stomach the rarest of chilies. You know the type, they can chow down on foods proceeded by the words "Suicide" or "5-Alarm" in which they need to sign a legal medical wavier to eat and the entire time brag about how "this is nothing at all, i've eaten much spicier". Meanwhile you can see the steam shooting from their ears, their tongue cracking like chapped lips in dry winter air and the waiter frantically hitting the 911 speed dial which happens to be labeled as one. If this describes you then you'll enjoy the next step of choosing your level of spiciness which ranges from 0 being the default level to 10 being the level in which hallucination is almost expected. As if this wasn't enough you can still pick from about fifteen different toppings like corn, garlic, scrambled eggs, bacon, kimchi or cheese.

With all the possible combinations available to me, I pretend to ponder the menu for a minute as if to impress the minimum wage high-school student behind the counter into thinking I'm making an educated well thought out decision, contemplating what a level two kimchi garlic omelet sprinkled with deep fried corn might taste like. A quick look at their menu would leave you to believe that pretty much anything goes in this place. If you wanted to try mayonnaise curry I'm confidant they'd throw a dollop in the frier for you and make up a price, in fact I think it's one of the toppings. With all this power at my fingertips I never fail to choose the same thing. "Creature of Habit.", my father used to jokingly say at our local chinese restaurant before predictably ordering his signature consomme soup and open-face hot beef sandwich. Me, I'm a chicken-katsu and cheese person but only two-hundred grams rice.

That reminds me. You can also customize the amount of rice to a hundred grams, 300g being the standard. If you can down 1,300 grams of rice, served in a plate the size of a small tire, in a certain time frame you get it for free. You get your polaroid on the wall and upon hearing your story of gluttony a small family in Bangladesh will curse the infidel pigs and their curry shop of unlimited combinations. When you die during your triple coronary bypass you get another polaroid on the back wall, except in this one you're not holding up your licked-clean plate with pride.

So when you're in Japan, alone and hungry (alone because it wouldn't be my first choice for a date) remember Coco Ichiban. You heard it hear first, or maybe second but I defiantly gave you more detail.
   36

That Mysterious Little Zipper

Posted on August 06, 2004
There's something nerve-racking about when the guy using the urinal next to you feels the need to unbuckle his pants and top button just to go pee. It's not that I'm watching or counting how many times he shakes, it's just a little difficult not to notice someone undressing so close by.

I wonder if he's ever thought about what that little zipper was for, or the slit in the front of boxer shorts. "These are all designed for easy access when relieving oneself" I'd tell him. "And to prevent one from having to tuck the back of your shirt in again and again and again, depending on the amount of coffee or oolong tea you consume per day."

I hope that if I and Mr. "I-have-to-pull-my-pants-down-to-pee" ever happen to cross paths again in the bathroom he would be willing to try out some of these suggestions or at the very least extend the courtesy of a one or two urinal buffer zone.
   2

Thursday Evening

Posted on August 02, 2004
As some of you may know, Kevin of bastish.net fame will be packing his bags for Sweden and leaving behind this dusty one-horse town.

I'd like to get together for a few drinks this Thursday around 6:30-7ish in Ebisu. So if you'd like to attend please leave a comment with an email address here as the location may change.

Time: Thursday August 5th around 6:30-7:00
Place: Khumbila -Nepali & Tibetan Restaurant
3 minutes from Ebisu Sta. Hibiya line, Yamanote line
   3

Permanent Residency

Posted on July 31, 2004

I got a notice in the mail from Japanese Immigration telling me that my Permanent Residency Visa application was approved. Yippee! Now I don't have to pay for re-entry permits when I come home from vacation. That's one step away from becoming a full blown Japanese citizen, but don't hold your breath on that one. Come on Canada, don't be jealous. I still love you too.


On a completely unrelated note, I'm currently enjoying these Italian potato chips made with extra virgin olive oil and they're not half bad.

   2

Livedoor Blog Television Ads

Posted on July 28, 2004
Late last night I saw what might have been the first televised commercial for a blogging service in Japan. Currently you have to sign up for a free account with Livedoor to view the streaming ads on their site.

Hmmn... I guess Livedoor is trying to court the late night nonsensical variety show types.
   0

CNN on the Fahrenheit 9/11 Private Screening in Tokyo

Posted on July 25, 2004
A segment by CNN's Atika Shubert on the Fahrenheit 9/11 private screening in Tokyo has been airing all day on CNN World News. If you look closely at the first few seconds you can see my back as I walk into the theater (still shot of my backside). Watch the video. (8MB quicktime required)
   0

I could tell you, but then I'd have to politely ask you not to tell anyone what it was that I had told you.

Posted on July 19, 2004
I've been invited to a special shindig tomorrow evening, and so today I celebrated by exchanging cash for goods and or services, otherwise called shopping. I picked up a much needed, and procrastinated about Speedlight flash for my Nikon SLR. What's the soiree you ask? I could tell you but then I would have to, well you know how it goes. Since killing someone via weblog or even RSS reader is not yet within the capability of current technology it'll just have to wait.
   0

Compulsive but not all that Obsessive

Posted on July 19, 2004
I'm not one to poke fun at others metal disorders, but a guy we meet in the elevator today is worth mentioning. From the ground floor to the 5th he assumed responsibility of elevator-man taking charge of the all important open close door buttons. He was what you could call a train geek or "aficionados" as the media calls them here. In a high pitched voice he imitated the train announcements from Shin-Yurigaoka station to Hon Atsugi on the Odakyu line. At the first floor he announced that the train was now leaving Shin-Yurigaoka Sta. bound for Odawara. When we arrived at the third floor he announced we were now pulling into Machida Sta. and politely added that we could transfer to the Yokohama line from here. Immediately as we departed the third floor he announced that the next station would be Hon Atsugi. Now this is where it all went wrong. See, the next station after Machida is Sagamiono, which was the station we were actually at, and following Sagamiono and before you get to Hon Atsugi you have to go through Ebina as well. The fact that he completely omitted two major express stations made me question really how "obsessive" this guy was. Maybe it's just plain old compulsive disorder, who am I to judge.

Maybe my expectations were set to high by hollywood, but to me it's like Rainman asking his brother to drive him to K-Mart for boxer shorts with the name Linda on them. Though in his defense he was very polite as he held the doors open and thanked us for flying Odakyu train lines.
   2

Straighten the Picture Frames and Change Undergarments

Posted on July 17, 2004
Wow, that was a big one. Rocked the one floor house pretty good out here in Odawara, and for the first time I'm not complaining about being out in the middle of nowhere surrounded by rice fields. Not as big as as the quake last year but at 5.5 on the richter scale it was still a doozie.

If anyone ever says earthquakes get easier to deal with over time, they're absolutely full of it. Somehow I don't think anyone would ever say this, but if someone might say this that person would therefore be full of it. And by it I'm referring to dirty lies.

Luis has a few more details on the quake.
   0

We don't play in your ashtray or spoon, so please don't smoke or shoot up in our sandbox.

Posted on July 14, 2004
On Monday Masako took Frankie to a small park very close to our apartment. Later that evening during dinner she told me how she had to pick out all the cigarette butts and trash from the sandbox before she could let Frankie play. I could feel a rant coming on, you know something about those dirty, dirty parks in Japan. But immediately after Masako when into how her good friend, that spent many years in Vancouver, told her about how children are educated about used needles in the parks and taught not to touch them. With the newer needle exchange programs I don't know whether or not this problem still exists in Vancouver but it sure put me back in my place.

I criticize things I observe in Japan often, yet I seldom do the same for Canada. I guess I should, though it�s always easier to hold the society that you live in under the microscope.
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22 Exotic Japanese Ice Cream Flavors

Posted on July 13, 2004
I'm a real picky eater, even when it comes to desert. I'm not a big fan of maple walnut ice cream so it would be safe to say that raw horseflesh ice cream with "real raw chunks of meat inside" would be off my list. Or how about Oyster, Garlic, Whale, Ox Tongue, or Sesame Soybean and Dried Kelp ice cream? Tempting, but no thanks.

These and 16 other "mouth watering" exotic ice cream flavors are for sale at Ice Cream City in Namco Nanja Town in the Sunshine 60 building in Tokyo's Toshima-ku. But don't all go at once, as they might sell out of their famous Lettuce and Potato Ice Cream and then you'll just have to settle for plain old chicken flavor.

My rss reader tells me I'm not the first to post this. Oh fish sticks, thought I had a scoop.
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Substances Seen on Peoples Faces during my Morning Commute.

Posted on June 25, 2004
Shaving cream, rice, dried yellowy substance from lip to bottom of chin, possibly mustard. Whiskey. Although not visible you could sure smell it, possibly Johnny Walker. Toothpaste, purple hair dye, in hair. This is a common one among women in the 55-70 year old demographic. Possibly on purpose. Umm, hair gel?
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Sundown Sessions 10.0

Posted on June 01, 2004
The next Sundown Downtempo Session, this coming Sunday (June 6), will feature the photography of fellow photoblogger Kevin Cameron.

If you don't want to get lost in the rain trying to find the venue like me make sure to check the map for antena, or if you like getting lost in the rain feel free to use my rushed napkin-map.
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Sundown Session

Posted on May 27, 2004
On the way back from Shinjuku on sunday I stopped in at Sundown Towntempo Session in Shimokitazawa. It was also opening night for Andrew Beveridge's photo exhibition, which made it a great excuse for attending. Here's a few photos I took, and should see a few more I took on Andrew's Canon 10D dSLR up on Sundown's site soon.
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'Hideous Absinthe' and France's Artistic Elite

Posted on May 23, 2004
NPR has an interesting interview with Jad Adams, author of Hideous Absinthe: A History of the Devil in a Bottle, about the cultural role the potent green liquor played among artistic circles in 1890s France. According to Adams Absinthe was to the painters and writers of the 1890's as marijuana was to the artist of the 1960's. Absinthe is still freely available in Japan.
   0

Letter to the Editor

Posted on May 07, 2004
My letter to the editor of the Japan Times was published on the web and should be in print this Sunday (May 9th). (UPDATE: My letter was published in the May 5th edition) Luckily their circulation dept keeps 3 months of back issues. Here's the scanned page.

Iraq war linked to a fable

In the April 26 article "'Quagmire' label doesn't apply to Iraq," writer Robyn Lim says the Iraq war "is part of the continuing war against terrorism, heralded by the surprise attack on America in September 2001 that killed 3,000 civilians."

Not a shred of evidence exists to support this claim. The unilateral/preemptive invasion of Iraq by the United States and its so-called coalition of the willing was based on faulty, outdated and just plain hyped intelligence. Lim implies that Iraq had ties to the 9/11 attacks, a crackpot theory debunked long ago. Not a single Iraqi was aboard the planes that killed the 3,000, and no connection has ever been found.

Yet the "neoconservatives" in Washington still cling to the fabled Iraq-al-Qaeda link to push their ideological fantasies. The fact is that 16 of the 19 hijackers were Saudis, but you never hear about the 9/11-Saudi Arabia link. The kind of misinformation in Lim's article is what makes most Americans believe that there is an Iraq-al-Qaeda link despite absolutely no evidence.

MARK HEGGE
Sagamihara, Kanagawa

Sure, the web's a great place to publish your ideas and opinions, but you still can't beat the coverage that writing to the editor of a newspaper with 50,000 plus readers gives you!
   0

Veggiemation

Posted on April 29, 2004
Forget computer animation, and even claymation. This is veggiemaion. I watched a show with Fran this morning called minori no mori no nakama tachi on NHK in which the entire show is made of fruits and veggies.
   0

Humanitarian Work is "Anti-Japan" says LDP Member

Posted on April 27, 2004
Japanese LDP member Takeaki Kashimura must be paying attention to how the Bush administration and the Right-Wing media in the US deals with dissent calling the recently released Japanese hostages "Anti-Japan" and "Anti-government" .

I thought this type of pointless language only existed in the US. I mean if you told an Italian or say a Mexican that they were Anti-Italian or Anti-Mexican they would most likely just laugh at you, but in the US, for many, those be fightn' words. [correction: the term I was thinking of was "Un-American" and not Anti-American]

Luis from Blogd.com has written and excellent post on the horrible treatment these brave humanitarians have received returning to Japan.
   0

put me down for a couple thou

Posted on April 23, 2004
Seems someone or something goofed and listed Apple eMacs for 2787 yen, about 25 US dollars, on Yahoo Shopping. Some 20,000 shoppers purchase 100,000,000 eMacs before the glitch was fixed. link
   0

Paris Incident

Posted on April 14, 2004
Last summer my mother and her husband spent 3 weeks traveling through out England, Scotland, Wales, Ireland and France. I got a call a few days after they arrived home and 90% of the conversation revolved around an incident in Paris. This was saved as a draft but somehow I forgot to publish it, so here it is. I asked them to write it in their own words.

"While on our trip to Paris, Elaine and i walked miles seeing the many historic sights of this beautiful and exciting city. One sunny day on a busy street we were approached by an excited Japanese couple who literally swarmed us and began pleading for help. Through hand signals and a brochure they held plus a few English words which seemed to consist largely of " thank you very much ",it became clear what they wanted.The brochure featured a display of designer handbags which were on sale for exorbient prices in a trendy and expensive looking store [luis vuitton] across the street.It was the kind of store i would normally avoid at all costs.

They wanted us to buy two purses for them. Apparently it was store policy to limit one to a customer, and since they had already bought one each they could buy no more. They desparately wanted another two, desparate enough to peal out 700 Euro dollars from a large roll and press it upon two astonished strangers. Elaine and i considered for a moment and with a shrug said " okay, what the heck". The store was staffed by well dressed and snobish looking sales people and security guards. We were informed it would be an hour wait in a long line; an hour we could ill afford from our precious time in Paris. However the deed was done and completed by handong over the purses and change to two very grateful Japanese. 700 Euros is over $1000 Canadian. It would have been so easy to walk away with it. However, they had chosen wisely.

The very next day we were astounded to be approached by another Asian couple making a similar request. Needless to say, we politely refused and walked quickly away. "
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Japanese government gives into tobacco industry yet again

Posted on March 07, 2004
If you just scan the headlines, like so many others do these days, you would be under the impression Japan has taken a positive step in the right direction towards banning tobacco advertising. on the other hand if you where to actually read any of the articles you would know this to be totally false.

The headlines were,

�Japan to ban tobacco ads in public places�
�Japan gets tough on smoking advertisements�
�Japanese lawmakers look to crack whip on tobacco ads�
�JAPAN: Tobacco ads to go up in smoke?�

What the headlines should have read is "Japanese government gives into tobacco industry yet again"

The Washington times reads,

�The Japanese government will impose a ban on tobacco ads in public places such as train and bus stations, the Mainichi newspaper said Monday. The goal is to prevent minors from acquiring the habit, officials at the Finance Ministry and the Tobacco Institute of Japan said. Beginning in April, cigarette advertisements will be banned in public areas except for tobacco shops and designated smoking areas. Advertising on transport vehicles such as trains, buses and taxis will still be permitted, but ads on television, radio and the Internet will be banned, except for advertisements exclusively aimed at adults. However, advertisements designed to improve smoking manners and prevent youth smoking are free from the ban, officials said.�

So wait, what is actually being banned here?? Advertising in public areas except for the actual train (every 3rd ad is for a tobacco company) radio and the internet? I can close the pop up ad but still have to stair at the Marlboro banner in my face for my 3 hour commute every day. But what I find most disturbing is the fact that this ban is not being regulated by the ministry of health but by the ministry of finance and the tobacco institute, the same ministry of finance that still owns 2/3 of Japan tobacco. Isn't that like letting the auto industry dictate car safety regulations or allowing pharmaceutical companies to approve drugs that hit the market?

If the ministry of health has no say in this then what the hell is it for in the first place. The leading cause of death in Japan is cancer with lung cancer at the top of the list. In 2001 55,028 (stats from the Japan Almanac 2003 published by the Asahi Shimbun) Japanese died of lung cancer alone not to mention stomach, liver, colon and rectum cancer, all of which are caused by tobacco. If this doesn�t fall into the mandate of the Ministry of Health then nothing will.

The fact is that the tobacco industry, namely JT (world's third-largest tobacco group), is dictating the laws of the land to the government which is by the way it�s biggest shareholder and the media is just completely fallen asleep on the issue, and try to present the picture that the government is cracking down on the industry, which if you look at the facts is just laughable.
   0

Parental Sellouts

Posted on February 06, 2004

roppongi fm3a / kodak gold 200 fuji superia 400

a few weeks back masako was walking through the station square with frankie on her back when she was aproched by a stranger. she introduced herself as a recruiter for children's modeling agency and wanted frankie to come in for an audition because as she put it "had a face like a doll". masako refused the offer politely and told the head-hunter that we were not interested. she told masako to "talk it over with your husband", they swapped numbers and she gave masako her card and said to expect a call from her office in a few days.

masako and i have discussed this before and both of us are strongly against selling frankie's image to any corporation whether it be for diapers, disney or a tobacco company. i don't believe child modeling is any different in canada but what makes it even worse in japan is way children are "classified" according to race, or is that nationality? well what ever it is they wouldn't list my daughter as either "japanese" nor "international" but "half". half? wtf is that!? half what? calling someone half in canada would result in a can of whoop ass being opened, but here it's thrown around like some sick badge of honour. if we are going to "classify" our children by fractions then let's get it right and do it across the board. children with 100% japanese blood will now be called 1 or whole or we could use the decimal system for a technically correct 01.0 (too bad there is no such thing as a 100% pure race but shhhhh... don't tell anyone) but wait, are we "grouping" by nationality here or by race? oh who cares! many people here seem to think they are one in the same anyway! so kids of 3 different backgrounds will be 1/3rds and so on. how about this, i propose that instead of taking away part of their identify when adding a nationality or race that we add a number like instead of half we would say double. yeah that sounds better! or an even better solution would be to STOP classifying and segregating our children period!

excerpt from "culture jam" by kalle lasn, founder of adbusters magazine

"half of all exotic dancers were once beauty-pageant contestants. that's a surprising statistic when you first hear it. it's hard to bridge the distance between the wholesome, naive, small town cavalcade queen who plays "the volga boatman" on the accordion and wants to be a vet, to the hardened stripper with seen-it-all-eyes grinding in red light on the stage of number five orange."
so sorry mom, you won't see frankie in any sears catalog, diaper ad or switch long distance telephone carrier commercials, at least while i still have a pulse.
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Sign the petition now

   3

The Future is Here

Posted on October 04, 2003


just saw a commercial for UFJ, one of Japan's "Big Four" banks, advertising their new 24 hour ATM machines. What will they think of next!
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Animal Abuse

Posted on September 28, 2003
scooter masako


I have to share what has consumed me for the past few days with the rest of you. Saturday during a walk Masako, Frankie and I came across a pet shop not far from our appartment. What we saw there was absolutely disgusting, apauling and sad. Please read (in Japanese), and stay tuned for updates.
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battle wounds

Posted on September 04, 2003


To make a long story short this is how I got my little battle wound today. I was walking back toward Masako and Frankie at Machida Sta. after buying a ticket and I saw she was tring to get a young teenager with his girl friend to put out his cigarette inside the station. When I returned he was still holding the smoke as Masako repeatedly asked him to butt it out. He gave the common yeah, yeah, yeah defense but wasn't budging. He finally got the message that we were not leaving untill he did what we asked and broke off the burning tip and tossed the still burning cigarette at Masako. I lunged forward and gave him a good hard punch/shove in the shoulder. He came right back at me but never tried anything. We went face to face for a few seconds as I egged him on some and his girl friend pleaded with him to just go. We walked away laughing a little and seemed to make him even more angry by the looks of his face red. Masako and I both tought he was just tring to impress his girl but obviously failed miserably. I didn't think he got a chance to hit me but noticed three red marks on my inner arm from his nails, a few minutes later.

   3

ciggy

Posted on August 13, 2003


I've noticed a decline in smoking lately inside our station, as least when I'm there. Maybe I have the reputation of being the crazy gaijin that yells at you when you smoke inside the station... I don't blame them. The last guy I had a word with was actually reading a poster inside the station promoting the new "no smoking" rules while sucking on a ciggy! He quickly distinguished the butt and that was it, no confrontation. I'm beginning to notice not only surprise when I confront the rule benders but also a little fear as well. This is great news because the last thing I want to do when out with Frances is have to get into a confrontation with some salary-man over his smelly habit.
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blue means green

Posted on July 25, 2003


In Japan blue means green, well not everything but when talking about traffic lights and young fruits green (midori) becomes blue (ao). Even after five years I still have a hard time when someone says "oh, the light turned blue" or "better run or we will miss the blue light" when referring to the green traffic light. I always ask family and friends why this is but all I ever get is "well, we know it's really green but we just call it blue, no reason." Recently I learned that fresh green bananas, tomatoes etc. are called blue. I could not make the connection until the other day when a colleague (non-Japanese) gave me his theory.

In English when we refer to someone or something as new or fresh we use the word green, but in Japanese blue is used to describe new and fresh. Why is that? Because, as the theory goes, when babies of asian decent are born they almost always have a large blue bruise-like birthmark on their behinds or lower backs. Even though I am caucasian my daughter Frances has a light blue birthmark or "mongolian bruise" on her bum. The mongolian bruise or spot as they are called are sometimes confused with bruises caused by child abuse. Blue=Young. This explains the fruits but what about the traffic light? Like I said, this is just a theory. What do you think?

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Koseki

Posted on July 10, 2003


Yesterday Masako and I went to our city hall to apply for the Certificate of Acceptance of Registration of Birth (Shussei todoke). We need this document from our city as one piece of ID to apply for the Certificate of Canadian Citizenship (CCC). We figured there would be no problem, and boy were we wrong. When Masako and I got married I encouraged her to use her maiden name Kubota as a middle name, but since the Japanese government does not recognize middle names she had to appear in front of a judge and change her last name to Kubota Hegge to give the feeling of a middle name but would officially be a last name on Japanese documents. While filling out the documents yesterday we had to state Frances's full name, Frances Shiori Hegge. When our case worker got to the name he let out a big sucking noise from between his teeth and an "eeeee kono myoji deha dame desu" (sorry but she can not have this last name). Turns out that since Japanese documents list Masako's last name as Kubota Hegge our daughter has to have the same last name. Well of course being her father my last name would naturally be used right? Wrong.

Japan has two systems of paper chase, the "Family Registry" (koseki touhon), and the "Residence Form" ( juuminhyou), which establish and clarify a Japanese's status re citizenship and domicile. When two Japanese marry, they alter their koseki . When they move, they register at their new address, and get a juuminhyou locally. With me so far?

However, if you are not a citizen, by law you are not accorded the right to have a koseki . This may sound like par for the course, but keep in mind that as a foreigner, you are put down on your spouse's koseki not as a married couple, under the heading "wife" or "husband" like any Japanese, but as a "remark" ( bikou) on the form. The marriage is treated differently--as a footnote--which is by definition discriminatory.
debito.org

Since Masako's name is at the top of the Koseki her last name is used and mine is not even considered seeing that her Koseki reads as if she were single and my daughter fatherless. To have our daughter's last name change back to its proper form Masako needs to go back to the courts to have her name changed yet again to Hegge and drop the Kubota, and this may take up to 3 months for a decision. To add to the list of pointless paperwork we, or shall I say my wife needs to complete is a form that, get this, proves Frances is spelled F-R-A-N-C-E-S, because when writing Japanese in Roman characters everything is phonetic, so Frances would then be spelled Furanshisu... We need to show ID for her that shows the correct spelling or the Japanese government will not accept Frances and make us use Furanshisu.

Which brings us back to our original objective, which was to obtain the Certificate of Canadian Citizenship, (this can be used as proof of her names spelling). Hope you can see the catch 22 here.

I feel like locking the Canadian and Japanese governments in a room and telling them that they can not come out until they decide on a solution to the problem they created. To me it feels like all this is set up to keep Japanese Japanese and Foreign Foreign. For example while filling out one of the 30 forms yesterday Masako entered her birthday and mine using the standard Emperor year format (the Emperor year format is used for all official government documents, 1978=53 in Emperor year format) As he crossed out my birth year our case worker told us that because I am not Japanese I have to use 1978 for my birth year and not the Emperor year of 53. Now who makes up a rule like that? Some 90 year old official with a bit of an agenda I think.

With Masako, Frances and I planning to visit my Family in Canada sometime in October or November we hope we can get everything in order and we all have names that are acceptable to the Japanese government, just wait till they find out I have 2 middle names! I might be deported for that.

   1

no smoking!

Posted on June 30, 2003
Masako is going into the hospital tomorrow afternoon for some more tests and will get settled in for a 6 day stay. Only a few days left. Not sure if I'm ready.

I finally got the new Sony Ericsson A5402S. It is loaded with camera capible of taking 640x480 photos, video and GPS. I'll be regularly posting photos in the moblog and my mobile shots gallery thanks to Kevin at MFOP.

On Saturday while coming back from a few beers in Machida I stumbled across some punk kid smoking in front of the escalators inside the station (smoking was banned in most stations May 1 , this year). I stopped and politely told him that smoking was not allowed here twice both in Japanese and English and he just stared back blankly and took another hard drag. I snapped, grabbed his wrist then his cigarette and tossed it off the platform and on to the tracks. Man that felt good but he probally lit one up right after I left.

Today as Masako and I were coming back from dinner through the station some business man was hiding a smoke behind a large concrete column. I walked directly up to him and gave him the same line about smoking not allowed. He replied with a sort of, "yeah, yeah, yeah go away" I grabbed him by the shirt and turned him around to show him the large "NO SMOKING" sign and he butted it out with his shoe heel. As we turned the corner to walk down the stares leading outside two highschool student came walking up, one with an unlit cigarette in his mouth. I watched him and thought, damn he is lucky that smoke isnt lit! As if he was reading my thoughts the little brat lit his smoke with a stinky zippo. I cut directly across the stairs while his friend ran out of my way. I gave him the same no smoking speech and he just looked at me blankly. I guess I was still built up from the last guy so I just snapped and yelled, I mean really yelled load NO SMOKING! CAN"T YOU READ THE SIGN?? in Japanese. They looked at each other in confusion and he stepped outside to finish his butt completely afraid of this raving crazy gaijin. Afterward I felt bad that I yelled at them, maybe they were just in the wrong place and the wrong time or maybe not.

I have nothing against smokers, I myself smoked on and off for the last 8 years but always respected the rights of non-smokers. I was very happy to see the smoking ban on private train lines this spring but no-one seems to be enforcing it or even stepping up and saying something when a group of teenagers are squatting around in a circle smoking and spitting on the platform or when the salary man sparks up next to the pregnant woman standing in line to buy a ticket. There is no penaltiy for braking this rule, so why would anyone abide by it? Maybe a little fear will help.

   2

miscommunication

Posted on June 25, 2003

When living in a foreign land and not speaking the language very well you are bound to have miscommunications. Most misunderstandings I don't lose any sleep over but the other day was a bit different. The girlfriend of a co-worker of mine, let's call him Yoshi-san, just gave birth a few days ago. Every day for about a week before she gave birth I asked Yoshi-san, "are you a papa yet?" he replied "not yet, but soon." Masako and I decided to have a planned delivery date before the due date (induced labour), so I asked him if they to would have a planned delivery date. My Japanese didn't make any sense and his English was not up to par so I asked a passer by, call this guy Suzuki-san, what "planned" was in Japanese. Immediately the conversation ended. Seems that Yoshi-san thought I was asking him if his girlfriends pregnancy was planned or an accident! Of course this is something I would never bring up, especially with someone I rarely talk with. Still have to straighten this one out because he still seemed a bit ticked at me today.
   4

Some Experimenting

Posted on June 23, 2003

Just a few experimental shots with the cybershot today. I found a bridge just around the corner from our apartment that crosses route 16. Our living room and bedroom patio doors open up to this very busy road but we have come accustom to it after almost 2 years living in Sagamiono. Actually the noisy road was a nice change from the US Navel base in Atsugi we used to live right next to. The air strip was only a stones through from our last apartment in Sagamiotsuka and we were right in the flight path. In the summer the navy pilots practiced their "touch and go" techniques until 11pm most nights, what hell that was! They would always seem to start training while I was making a long distance call home to my mom and have to go room to room trying to find a quite spot and end up in the bedroom closet just to hear her.
   0

new shirts

Posted on June 14, 2003

You can never own too many t-shirts especially during the hot and muggy Japanese summer. Going thought 3 t-shirts a day during the hottest months here is not uncommon. Every year I am forced to go through my summer clothes from last year and weed out all my yellowish tees. I haven't yet but I will need to throw out one of my favourite shirts, a banana republic shirt I bought while in Maui for our wedding in 2000. I bought a couple of Uniqlo shirts yesterday for 1,000 yen each and they have some pretty cool prints on them to "stone by gettyimages".
   0

pay parking

Posted on June 11, 2003

Masako and I went for a walk last night to 7-11 which is just a 2 min walk from our apartment and I counted the pay parking lots along the way. Our apartment is completely surrounded by pay parking lots that you see the the above photos and when an old building comes down a new parking lot goes up, until another building is built again. I would like to see some grass planted and a place for kids to play but I guess it just shows how valuable land is here.
   0

Beer or happoshu?

Posted on June 04, 2003
got-beer.jpg

The glass says Ichiban Shibori, but my head this morning is saying no, no that was happoshu dude.
If you live in Japan and for some reason you never go to the bar, or the store or leave your appartment for that matter I'll explain the drink that is called happoshu. Happoshu or 'near beer' is not beer and if you look closely at a bottle or can of happoshu you never actually see the word "beer", you only see the term "brew". Due to a tax loophole in Japan Happoshu can be sold at a much cheaper price then beer. Happoshu skimps on malt and loads up on less esteemed ingredients, corn syrup, rice or sugar thereby qualifying for a much lower tax. If you're not sure what it was you had last night at the cheap izakaiya you will know after the headache and stomach pains hit.
   2

This place sucks

Posted on May 31, 2003


no, i mean they really suck, with a vacuum cleaner (click on the photo to see the vacuum cleaner in his hands). Every month or so I go to a place called "it's" to get my hair cut. If you are familiar with Sagamiono it is the old Sonne Swiss Cafe.

This place is great, only 1000 yen for a hair cut and no frills. Most discount hairdressers charge you for a shampoo even when you don't need it and end up charging you again for that little bit of gel or wax they style your hair with. I always hate paying for that stuff because I go directly to the washroom and re-style my hair the way I like it anyway.

I remeber this one discount barber shop in the basement of Yamato station that had sign out side reading 1000 yen/10 min, and no change allowed. You had to pay with a 1000 yen bill, 2-500 yen coins, sorry no good. The rules there might have chaged since then though. Over all "it's" is a great place full of mystery, I never know what I'm going to look like every time. I use the same picture from a men's hair magazine and it seems that every stylist has his or her own interpretation. The photo I show them is like Brad Pitt from Seven but my friendly stylist Mihoko makes me look like Jim Carey from Dumb and Dumber. That's okay, they did give me a free bottle of sesame salad dressing....???
   2

Reading the job ads, or just trying to stay out of the sun?

Posted on May 30, 2003

taken outside Kokuryo Station on the Keio line.
   1

Moblog up and running

Posted on May 29, 2003


Well with thanks to Kurt Easterwood I finaly got my sidebar moblog up and running, complete with a photo that I did not take. It is not that I'm lazy and stole someones photo, i just don't have a camera phone. Hello everyone, my name is Mark and I do not have a kamera ketai. There, I said it and feel better now. If you are not familar with Japan the photo in my moblog is of Landmark tower in Yokohama. It is, or was up untill last year the tallest building in Japan. Once the new A5402S comes out i'll be sending up my own moblog content.

I know this is completely off topic but I gotta tell this story. Just now 2 men came to our door and made it sound like they were there replacing all the filters above the gas ranges in the mansion. Once in a while people from the appartment agency do come by and do things like check the carbon monoxide alarm, clean out the drains etc. at no cost of course. These guys came in and started installing this new filter and as they were fitting it the other gentlemen started his sales pitch on how great these filters were and how all the house wives loved them, blah, blah, blah... you get the point. Then comes the price.

Masako: why do we have to pay extra if it is required by the appartment agency? (that is what rent is for) Sales man: ahh, yes. We are not exactly from the agency. Masako: So you guys are just salesmen? Sales man: ahhh, yes. (in a lot more words) Me: get the F*%#! out. (in a lot more words)

anyone who knows the Japanese language knows that it is not very polite to talk very directly to others or make your point too early. You drop hints at what you are tring to get at and take the scenic route around to make your point. so my little breakdown of the conversation is far from beiing word for word or a direct translation.
   2

Parasites and Stomach lining

Posted on May 26, 2003


Masako and I took Otosan and Okasan out for a yaki-niku dinner on Saturday to celebrate a late mother's day. We had been to this restaurant 5 min drive from Shin-Matsuda station many times but I saw something I have never laid my eyes on in the almost 4 years here in Japan. Cow stomach, and trust me it looks worse then it sounds. And to kill the taste of the cow guts how about some raw ground beef topped off with a, you guessed it, a raw egg. That reminds me I really gotta check out that parasite museum in Meguro.

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7.0M Earthquake

Posted on May 26, 2003

About 6:27 by my watch there was a huge earthquake. I have never felt such a big earthquake since about 6 months after l arrived in Japan and was staying with Masako's parents. At the time I just thought it was some strong wind cause the window shutters were shaking and raddling. This one measured 7 in northeastern Japan and about 4 here, but did not seem to cause any major damage. for you viewing pleasure here are some photos and videos of the English NHK broadcast I just watched. Now I gotta get some food in me. Video is here 1.7MB 2.2MB 5.1MB 13.6MB

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3 Hours

Posted on May 25, 2003

Masako and I went to see the doctor yesterday and it took 3 hours from the time we walked it to the time we could pay and leave. The problem see is that even though Aiku Hospital is very beautiful and clean they do not take appointments. Yeah, this is not a typo. They do not take appointments! Everyone just shows up as early as they can and waits for their turn. They give you a wrist band that vibrates when it is your turn to move up to your next station. So basically you end up using up half your day waiting to see the doctor for 10 min. Complaining aside, I forget all about it when I can listen to my daughters' heart beat and see her wiggling around on the ultrasound. I took a short video of the doppler heart beat check. If you would like to view you can download it here.
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Go outside and get some fresh air

Posted on May 24, 2003

...but remember your gameboy and don't leave the damn parking lot this time! I'm sure we have all seen this one time or another, or we might have even been like this when we were their age. Me, I blame the city planning, or lack there of. During the new year holiday Masako and I went to visit some friends who lived very close to what was called the Kanagawa Science park. When we got to their station I asked "so where is this Kanagawa park?" "your looking at it." he replied pointing to the building complex housing a hotel and R and D offices. Around back there was a large patch of green grass closed off with a sign that read, "Keep off, only use for disaster evacuation" and right beside the forbidden green was an asphalt play ground where the kids were alowed to use. I wish I had my camera that day!
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Money no Tora

Posted on May 23, 2003
Money no Tora TV showMoney no Tora TV show
Japanese TV, it can either Suck or Kick Ass! I have never heard the term "reality TV" over here because there is nothing else, it is all reality TV. I watched this show tonight called Money no Tora where some eager entrepreneurs stand infront of 4 or 5 rich investors and pitches his dream hoping they will pile up the cash. And I mean PILE up the cash! The desk in front of the "investers" is piled high with stacks of 10,000 yen bills. The guy in todays show was a rave dj wanting something like 100,000 Dollars to start up his own record label, and walked out with 8,200,000 yen in CASH! Here are some pics.
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Into the City

Posted on May 23, 2003
Masako on the train
It's been a while since I've been into the city. Masako and I headed up to Ebisu to see Masako's friend from Victoria and her year old daughter Moe. First time for me to meet her, and what a cutie she is! To get back to the ketai story, I went to Hit Shop last night to get the new A1301S. When the clerk found out that my current phone was only 4 months old he just said "Muri" and I could not get the discount on the phone and end up paying 40,000 yen for it! ... that was it. So we walked out confused. It is a very strange feeling when someone will not take your money, its like, I give you money... you give me a product or service... simple, no. Turns out that AU requires you to have your ketai for 10 months or more before you can upgrade you phone. We visited the AU shop in Sagamiono later today and they were much more help then the dropouts at Hit Shop. She explained that I could just cancel my contract with AU, pay a 1,000 yen fine, and sign up again. That way I can get a new phone at discounted price but have to get a new # a 080 number no doubt. She told me to wait for the new A5402S that will be coming out sometime next month. So I think I'll wait to see that new one and by that time the A1301S will be even cheaper. I REALLY wanna get moblogging soon.
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