A fascinating piece of fiction written by a twelve year old on this utopian make believe country called Japan, published in the San Francisco Chronicle the other week --- or that it would be if it were meant to be fiction by an actual twelve year old. In this perfect land of Japan the police don't carry guns and the few criminals that they do deal with, Right, and the Bushido code of honour is alive and well in the Japanese criminal community. Adam Sparks, if that's even his real name, goes on to say that there's no homeless problem. I guess Adam failed to notice the blue tarp village in Ueno park, or the bodies lined up every morning sleeping on cardboard boxes in Shinjuku station. But the final insult comes when he reveals the true intent of his article, that the Japanese Earth to Mr. Sparks, dispite that being far from the truth, when we in the international "Reality-Based Community" call someone simple and people like Bush cowboys it's not meant as a complement.

Feel free to read the entire gush and mush article in its hilarity. I do have one question for Mr. Sparks though. When you pulled all these stereotypes and assertions out of your ass, did it hurt? This is the type of fluff I would expect to read on someone's weblog (like mine) after a few days spent in a foreign land, but not from a major US daily.

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