A couple times a week I try to eat an ultra-healthy dinner to make up for all the fatty foods I eat during the rush-rush Monday through Friday work week. Last night we made a really nice green salad - lettuce, cherry tomatoes, spinach, carrots, avocado, green peppers and baby cucumbers with a Japanese soy based (wafu) onion dressing topped with tuna. Sounds good doesn't it? Now wipe that drool from your chin.

While taking in large mouthfuls of salad and keeping up an interesting conversation with my one year old daughter regarding some mysterious thing only she could see on the ceiling and the baby picture on her Gerber brand jar of pureed prunes, I took a big bite out of my tongue.

I've never experienced that type of pain in that region of my face, or body for that matter. It would be the equivalent on a pain scale to being kicked in the privates. Yet on top of that you only have your self to blame where as it would be an incredible feat to bag oneself in the cojones.

I doubled over in pain, and out poured a mouthful of half chewed lettuce, cherry tomatoes, spinach, carrots, avocado, green peppers and baby cucumbers with a Japanese soy based onion dressing and a little bit of tuna. I rushed over to the kitchen sink and spit out blood, and for the rest of dinner I kept a wad of paper towel to the tip of my wounded tongue.

Speaking only in vowels I never did get a chance to ask Fran what she was talking about on the kitchen ceiling or if she recognized the Gerber baby from the hospital.

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